Thursday, May 29, 2008

To the one that was, and always will.

I don’t hate you. I can’t. Never could.
I’m not here to fight. I’m not here to defend myself even. I’m not pointing fingers.
Maybe someday you will understand.
Why it had to happen this way.
I have loved you with all my heart, from the very first day.
I know you do, love me. You are true and I know you care.
Then, what’s wrong, you wonder?
Nothing is wrong.
Why do we look for what went wrong?
I’m going to tell a story. A story of what went right.
We were friends since we were little,
I can honestly say I fell in love with you at 11 years old
You were like the sunshine, your smile made me happy inside
When everything else made me grey, you made me yellow, orange and red.
We were together, we were apart.
We weren’t kids, we loved each other for reasons no one can fathom
I’ve loved you ever since, no one else comes close, nobody could.
Even when we weren’t together, I knew we will be.
I believed so. And so it was.
Together again.
You were everything. My reason for everyday.
God, you’re so beautiful.
Nothing could make me happier.
Truly, this is love, I say.
So many things we went through,
Good and bad, we braved it together
I felt like we could face anything that came
We’re going to last. This is forever.
Then here we are, how did we get here?
It happened so fast, where did it all go?
It was so near, yet so far.
This doesn’t make sense!!
So this is where the story changes.
Mind you, we are not the Writer.
We are works of fiction, written by God.
He is the One, the Almighty.
I cannot say when or where.
I changed. You changed. We both did.
Circumstances happened, giving us different set of experiences.
We weren’t stuck in a time warp.
We did move. In opposite directions.
One thing we both were sure of,
We were looking for what we were looking for
To reach our dreams, to realize our potential
In a journey to be better people
Each encouraging the other, to be the best that they can be
Never realizing in the process,
We were both going separate ways.
One thing is true.
We became better people.
But we also became different people than when we started.
You are a greater man now, than before
We always believed in each other.
Maybe that is our story
We were part of each other’s lives when both were lost
Both hurt and looking for directions in life
Not knowing ourselves or what we wanted
So we decided, to be there for one another
We held hands throughout the journey
Braving each obstacle together, one helping the other
Never giving up
Looking for happiness, searching for each other's utopia
We reached a crossroad.
We said its okay, we’re stronger now
The answers you seek are in that way, and mine the other
We have to continue the journey separately
To each his and her own
It didn’t matter, its okay, we said
I just want you to be happy
You want me to be happy too
Let’s cross the bridge when we come to it
See you at the end of the road
But like two parallel lines, never to meet in a single point
Maybe that is our story
We were in each other’s lives to help each other through
At one point in time
To be better people
But was never meant to finish the journey as one.
Shafik, you helped me believe in myself
You helped me find happiness and joy in things I never normally would
You made me laugh, you made me smile like I never smiled before
You showed me how to play and enjoy life, enjoy love, enjoy family
What you gave to me,that will never change, no one will ever replace
You helped me overcome my fears, my tears and my flaws
You are some of the most beautiful memories I ever had
Thank you for being part of my journey and helping me through
I left not because of hate, or of anger
I understand, now that we know what we’re looking for
And where we are heading
That we want the same things but in very different ways
And it is only fair, and out of love
That I let you go,
So you can be, the man that you are supposed to be
A great man indeed
So understand, from this point on
Don’t look back in anger
There was nothing wrong
We did what we had to do
I have no regrets of our relationship,
It was beautiful for what it was
And it was meant to be what it was meant to be
I only wish the best for you
And your happiness means the world to me
From this point on
We continue our journey
In separate ways
To become the best that we can be
But know that you will always be my dearest
A part of me only God knows how much
And my prayers will always be with you
God has written the story of us
Neither of us knowing how it will end
Goodnight and goodbye
For what it was and always be.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Losing your mind for the sake of your heart

Dear God, please help me through this. Help me be strong.
I really thought he would, I really did. I was so wrong. so wrong.
Please let it die. Please don't let it hurt so bad.
i cant afford to be sad
I know now its true. I guess I've always known
but i kept making excuses for the sake of my own

Get on the train my dear irina
Before it moves and leaves you again
get on the train
We'll go someplace and start over
Come lean on my shoulder
We'll do this together
everything will be alright, we're still on our feet
but be prepared to bleed
Cut me, I'll grow
Hold on silly girl, it'll get better you know
Yeah it will, I'm sure
keep running on your faith
for good things come to those who wait
He let you go, he let you go
So leave, leave ....
Say goodnight and go