Monday, October 29, 2012


Umpama ketam
Berjalan tidak terus, tidak lurus
Melangkah ke sisi
berjalan di tepi-tepi
Lebih selamat, kata hati.

Kerana takut menerjah
takut takut ia lari
takut ia hilang dan pergi

Pada aku, kau berharga
Kau dua dari tiga, empat atau lima
Tapi mungkin itu aku
Mungkin kau tak rasa begitu

Perasan aja aku ini
Agh, sudah lebih dari sekali
Usia sudah meningkat tua
Sayang sekali

Bak si ketam dengan penyepitnya
Cuba ku sepit seerat mungkin
Tapi kekadang terpaksa ku lepas jua
Aku berpura-pura dingin
Macam aku yang tak hingin

Seperti ketam
Cengkerangnya sahaja keras
Isinya terlalu lembut
Macam kertas
carik-carik jadi kusut

Bersembunyi di sebalik batu
hanyalah cara untuk melindungi diri
dari sakit hati

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Living up to LIFE.

Humans can do anything and everything. 
The only challenge is time, energy and the human will. 
We were created great, so live up to it.

After my awakening of time, I started to use it more. Not to say that that it lessens or increases, it doesn't in fact, time that is. What I meant is, as I am more aware of it now, I'm trying to do as much as I could.

I took on anything and everything, I wanted to fulfill my possibilities, my human-ness, my full potential so to say. I don't know how much longer I'll be alive, life is too short to just wait to die. I want to achieve all my dreams and I know I can, because anyone can, it is as clear as day. God is great, the greatest in fact. God created us in His likeness, so we are great too, I mean, we had the THE ULTIMATE DESIGNER design and made us. 

So my absolutely 'rojak' dreams; (as of the last time that I listed it whilst doing The Passion Test), are all absolutely possible to be achieved. Just 4 key ingredients;

All will happen, all will be fullfilled, IN TIME. Not a moment earlier or later, everything will come at the time it is supposed to. And you cannot change time, like, ever. Sometimes people also call it luck. I believe luck has a lot to do with timing.

I have mass. I have energy, I need energy, I use energy, I lose it. Energy does not disappear, it merely transforms. Forgive my physics, but for anything to Work, I need Energy and Force. So if I understand correctly, I need to Force myself to go the Distance for it to Work. And since Albert Einstein’s theory has been proven, and since I cannot move at the speed of light, so I either have to be really ‘nothing’ (no Mass), or massively huge like The Hulk, or really fast like The Flash to be powerful. So since I’m not either, I just need to Work over Time to achieve my Powers.

Out of all the Powers, I think the most superhuman power of all is the power of will. Ironically, ‘Will’ in Bahasa Malaysia is ‘Daya’ and ‘Daya’ in physics is Force. So in essence, you need a forceful will. Most importantly because every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Inertia. The more you push, the more challenges will oppose you, the more you try, the harder it gets. NEVER GIVE UP. We have all this mass (our body), all this time, all this energy and what do we use it for? Being lazy is such a luxury. We all are given the same amount of time.

But my will is also connected to what I want. I only will, if it is something I want. I want to achieve all my hopes and dreams, so am I willing to do what it takes? My dreams are HUGE so my will has to be GARGANTUANLY HUMONGOUS. I want it so bad, that I have no choice but to will it. So now I will myself to do oh so many things, to see how much I possibly could, turns out I could do sooo much. I never actually realized that, I usually foresee myself not being able to do it, so I give up trying it out in the first place, I thought I was being realistic y’know, not wanting to get over my head and all, but I see now how much I underestimate my own human capabilities. JUST DO IT and GIVE IT ALL YOU GOT.

Why? Why go through so much pain and struggle? Why don’t we just sit back, relax and enjoy? I mean isn’t that how to live life? Sometimes when I get overwhelmed of life, I question myself, WHY THE HELL DO I PUT MYSELF THROUGH THIS? Sometimes people around me ask “Kenapa kau susah-susahkan diri, bukannya dapat apa pun?” translation “ Why do you go to so much trouble, its not like you’ll get anything from it”. This is a sample of inertia. The opposing forces I told you about earlier. But that’s the thing, why I do what I do. Why is it important to have dreams and try to achieve them? Why I push myself to do the things that are hard or tiring or just simply things I don’t like to. My reason for it all, my reason for life, for living is just one. For my Creator. I am given everything by HIM, all that I ever could need. Everyone needs a direction. A reason. No amount of force could be asserted to move something if it has no direction, because the opposing force would just make it static. It would just stay still. It won’t go anywhere.

Well for me, I have a direction, I have a reason and I do everything so I could reach it. Jannah is my direction and the limitless bountiful unconditional love of God is my mission. I try my best to be the best version of me I could possibly be because I was created great, so I am living up to it.

I’m writing my own life story and I want it to be amazing.

P/s: This entry is particularly inspired by Cecilia Ahern's Time of my Life, some episodes of The Big Bang Theory, the self help & motivation section at Bookexcess, and of course my Life and my Creator.