Sunday, March 18, 2007

"You're just a lazy, self-indulgent girl who's driving herself crazy."

"Carmen, please leave me alone.Please."

Just do it, man. just start it. what the hell are u thinking of?
Why are you wasting it all away?
Wake up girl.
Dont do this again. Dont. please dont please dont.
just need to write
then write it. get it out girl.
I want to be okay.
everythings gonna be fine.
i love you.
please dont do this to urself.
I know u're better than this.
We'll get thru this. we will.
pull urself together girl
ur good, u are. please beleve me.
just do the thing okay.
I'm with you.
it will all be okay. everything will be all right. stick it.
pleae get her away from me.
i dont want her anymore.
u can do this. i know u can.
we'll get rid of her. How? she's inside me.
I hate her. I hate her so much.
she's ruining everything. please help me.
only u can help urself. fight her.
I fight her with all my heart, she fights me back even worse.
I have nobody. Pls God help me.
please help me. I dont want to do it anymore.
I want to go away from everything and evryone.
I want to go where no one knows me. I want to start all over. please, please, there's just so much wrong. writing makes me feel better. write on my love, write on. we'll get thru this.

i tried doing the work everywhere with different people in different places. just doesn't cut it.
I came home. I wanted to feel the sense of family again. I'm losing myself.
I think I'm okay now. Time to kick some ass!!!

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